(Media-Newswire.com) – ARLINGTON, Va., Sept. 11, 2008 – “Communication saves lives on the battlefield. It saves marriages, too.”
That was a major theme that Army Chaplain ( Lt. Col. ) Antonio Daggett stressed at the National Guard Strong Bonds Marriage Seminar in Old Town Alexandria, Va., Sept. 5 to 7.
About 20 Guard couples attended the retreat, which was geared to strengthen marriages through improving communication skills. Daggett, who works in the National Guard Bureau’s chaplains’ office here, facilitated the seminar that equips families with tools to combat the stressors of military service.
On Day 1 of the seminar, Daggett explained the danger signs of marriage communications, such as “escalation,” and demonstrated them through videos of actual couples discussing their marital issues.
In one video, a conversation that started with household cleanliness escalated into talk of separation. The chaplain delved into other communication no-no’s, such as withdrawal — “Yes Dear, whatever you say, Dear” – and “invalidation,” which he called a $10 word for name-calling.
“Our communications are pretty good, but could use a little tweaking,” said Cynthia Cole, wife of Army Lt. Col. Reyes Cole of the National Guard Bureau’s counterdrug office, who attended the weekend retreat.
By their own admission, it’s been a stressful year for the Coles and their four young children. Along with recent deployments to Iraq, Afghanistan and Kyrgyzstan, the colonel suffered a massive pulmonary embolism last year that almost ended his life.
“This has been a great way for us to decompress and reconnect and find out what we have been doing right and what we can improve on,” Cynthia Cole said.
These seminars, held around the country for married Army and Air National Guard couples, are part of the Strong Bonds Program, which began in 1999 and was formerly known as Building Strong and Ready Families.
